Full Circle

Anomaly scan went just fine today! Phew. I prayed last pm that God would send me a sign that everything was going to be okay today. I woke up at 4 am to go to the bathroom and a few minutes after I got back into bed I felt it. I felt the baby! It was just one poke but it was definitely the baby. It was not gas. Another answered prayer. And now I recognize the baby's movements, so subtle yet so incredibly reassuring.

The sono was another amazing experience today. The sonographer measured all the baby's organs, head, femur, abdomen, cord, spent a lot of time looking at its head and face. It was the longest sono we've had since it had to be so thorough. The face was my favorite part. We saw the baby yawn, move its fist into its mouth, stretch one arm over its head. The baby has the most perfect profile. I cried. Never in my life have I cried more tears of joy than I have these past few months.

Every sono it sinks in a little more that we are having a baby, that it's not just a dream anymore. On exactly this week last year I was in the depths of despair. Our first IVF cycle had just come to a disastrous end. I'd cried until I physically could not cry anymore. Sometimes it surprises me at times how raw the pain of our infertility still is. It's days like today though that I am really thankful for it. I'm experiencing a living miracle every day. I had one doctor tell me not once but twice that donor egg was our only option for a viable pregnancy. He said our chances otherwise were less than 10% (where he got that figure, I don't know). Don't think his words didn't haunt me everyday of our last cycle! And here we are. One year later, almost half way through our viable pregnancy.