Part III

Crazy to say we're officially in the 3rd trimester now! I have a feeling this last one will be a lot different from the first two. The first tri was hard for me mentally b/c of the anxiety I battled, but I think this one will be toughest physically for me. I feel the growing pains everyday lately and I've had to really restrict my activity or the kinds of activity I can do. Third tri fatigue is also starting to set in. My energy level feels different now than it did 3 months ago. And I know it's only the beginning! I've had to learn to eat smaller, more frequent meals to try and avoid heartburn that makes an appearance more and more often. And the latest development - Braxton Hicks. Oh boy. It's a little scary to think my body is already 'practicing', but what can I say, I'm an over-achiever ;p

Some of my favorite memories from our 2nd tri:

• Realizing I was feeling baby Bill move. It was right at 18 weeks and I was in FL visiting my Aunt Glady. I read what fetal movements felt like and I had been on alert for them for the past 2 weeks, so I made the distinction pretty quickly between him and gas. Since that first day, feeling him move makes me stop everything I am doing and just marvel at this miracle of life and our blessing and say a silent prayer of thanks for the 898457 time. 
• The first time Bill felt baby Bill move. One evening we were on the couch watching tv and he started having a hyperactive episode so I said to Bill, wanna see if you can feel? He gave me his hand, felt the little 'twitch' and pulled it away like he had touched a hot stove. Haha, different experience for men I guess.
• I learned you can actually hear the baby's heartbeat around 25 weeks without a doppler or stethoscope, so when I told Bill he immediately wanted to try. It was before work one morning and after waiting a minute with his ear against my belly he abruptly stood upright, smiled a great big toothy smile, his whole face lit up, and said, I heard it! I walked on clouds the rest of the day.
• Our gender reveal party of course. And once we knew and we could call our baby by name, it made him feel like more than just a fantasy. 
• The new-found love, respect and appreciation I have for my body. Infertility made it hard to have those feelings. But the realization that my body does what it does everyday of this pregnancy is truly awe-inspiring. Bill has always been expressive in the way he feels about me and the way I look since we met, but more and more each day he finds words to say and ways to show me how beautiful he thinks I am. He's my little belly worshiper and I love it :D  Mostly because I know it's not just my belly he admires so much, but what's inside it.
•  The attention to this pregnancy from others, even strangers or those I don't know very well, makes it feel even more special. I love talking about baby Bill, naturally, and I love being able to celebrate this pregnancy without as much of the fear and anxiety that I had during the 1st tri. Of course it never goes away completely, but it's easier to feel reassured when I can actually see and feel him there, along with the rest of the world.

So here we go, onto the final phase. I think about how I felt in those early weeks. The 3rd tri seemed so far away because it seemed intangible still. The thought of our 3rd trimester felt like a far away island, separated by an ocean of uncertainty. 

Three months or less until the biggest day of our lives.

I'm still pinching...